2014 Retrospect

I try and do a retrospect of my year (at least via my blog) every year. Here is 2014. This was a rough year for me and for my family. We had a lot of things go wrong, dear family members passed away, relationships faltered and regained footing, accidents happened, illnesses... definitely not one of my better years. I am severely depending on 2015 to be better than this!

Past retrospects:
2013
2012
2011
2010

January

We spent our New Year's Eve in Morehead City at the Crystal Coast Countdown. New Year's Day was spent watching the Capital One Bowl.

I started working out again, this time weightlifting. Also didn't last.

Then we booked our AMAZING trip around the Mediterranean. I spent many later entries blogging about it afterwards, but the trip itself was in January. It was fantastic but...

The week we returned my beautiful Aunt Joan lost her battle with cancer. Our family was devastated.

 

February

I was still reeling from my Aunt's passing and as soon as I returned to North Carolina I started rehearsals for a show at the community theatre. I honestly didn't blog the entire month save for one give away. Probably the least amount of blogging I did since I began this thing five years ago.

 

March

I spent most of March blogging about our Trip from January.

Getting There and Pisa, Italy, Florence, Italy, Monaco, Toulon France, Barcelona, Spain, Valencia, Spain, Mallorca, Spain, At Sea and Tunisia, Africa, Palermo, Sicily Italy, Naples and Pompei Italy

I was cast in a production of A Doll's House that performed in March and April.

April

I blogged about acting and the show again.
I realized how badly I was slacking on my blog and talked about it. Plus I made Pisanki.
And I worked Easter Sunday. Which kind of stunk.

May

Ryan and I celebrated our Fourth Wedding Anniversary.
We had tickets to see Lady Antebellum in Raleigh, our first country concert!
I acknowledged how awesome all the mothers in my life are, especially my mom, for Mother's Day.
Ryan and I took a trip to Duplin Winery to celebrate our anniversary.
I attended the Paraprofessional Library Conference
And my BEST FRIEND in the whole world GOT MARRIED and I got to be a bridesmaid for the first time! Plus Ryan and I had a day to play in NYC and see a Broadway show together for the first time.

 

 

 

June

 

I blogged about being frustrated.

Then, a first for me, I angrily posted about a current event... I never do that!

Hurry up and wait strikes again. The Career Planner didn't submit my husband's SDA package (it sat on his desk for two weeks) so my husband had to come up with a Plan B.
 I had my first major sickness of the year and ended up in the ER... they thought I had meningitis but luckily that was not the case.
Plus we went fishing. And had lots of Stormy Weather days.
And Josh Groban answered me on Facebook, completing my life.


July

We had my sister in law Hannah here and spent the 4th of July with friends.
Ryan asked me out for a special Date Night.
I made some Observations stemming from my job.

August

 I mention my lack of blogging again, a theme for this year.
I was shattered when my childhood icon and favorite actor Robin Williams passed away.
I QUIT SMOKING. Finally.
Then Ryan and I got into a serious accident in our truck. We were lucky to walk away with cuts and bruises but our truck was totalled. We went to the ER to get checked out to be sure we were ok, my second trip this year.


September

I turned 27.
 Ryan and I had a "redo" of our Labor Day Weekend, what we would have done originally had the accident not happened. First he had a goodbye dinner with his shop since his SDA was finally approved and then we started our time together at Battleship North Carolina.
Then we did Hungry Town Bike Tours and Fort Macon.


October

I officially mention Ryan starting his SDA and we attend Oktoberfest.
 Then I got really sick. Sick enough I was out of work and rehearsals for about a week. ER trip number three as well as Urgent Care and my regular doctor.
The Dup turned 3!
I was in another show, Dracula, over Halloween weekend playing Lady Van Helsing.


November

The Marine Corps turns 239.
I finally got some answers as to why I was so sick. My gallbladder basically stopped working.
Ryan and I spent some much needed time together.
We attend the Birthday Ball for SOI in Wilmington.
I blog about being Thankful, regardless of the rough year.
We spend Thanksgiving in South Carolina with both of our families.




December

My childhood dog Dippy crossed the Rainbow Bridge at 13 and a half years old.
I shared our Christmas Decorations.
Ryan graduates SOI Instructor School.
My surgery gets scheduled for January 28th, 2015... adios gallbladder and nausea!
We spend a cozy Christmas at home together.
And for New Year's we plan on visiting my family in the mountains. I will probably blog about that in the New Year.

I hope you all had a fabulous 2014. Our was a little rough, one of our roughest, but there were still some great high points. I don't blog about everything, most of the good and bad made it here, but some things do not need to be shared with the internet. I know many bloggers braver than I who do share everything, but I am not able to do that. Know things are getting better and I am optimistic for the year ahead. I hope 2015 strengthens my relationships, my faith and gives us more ups than downs. I know Ryan's work schedule will be absolutely INSANE but I hope I use that time constructively too. I hope I am happy. I hope when I do my 2015 retrospective I make you all positively nauseous with how amazing the year is.

 

Happy New Year everyone. Once again, thanks for sticking with me through another year.

 

Loss of a Legend

"You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it." - Robin Williams

The only souvenier I asked for on my family trip to Disney that now hangs in our guest room.

Robin Williams has been my favorite actor for my entire life. People have poked fun at me for it (never in a mean way) about how he was always my top of the heap favorite, but I know I am not alone (based on the social media take over alone). The world lost a wonderful, talented man yesterday. I am not going to lie, I cried when I heard he passed away. My entire life I dreamed of meeting him, and my top actor dream of actually acting with him, will now never be realized. This brilliant man had demons darker than any of us knew and is now no longer with us. His wife is a widow and his children are without their father... and it breaks my heart.

 

On acting: "All the new people you meet, it's pretty amazing. The vampire needs new blood. And there is still a lot to learn and there is always great stuff out there. Even mistakes can be wonderful."

I remember being young, really young, and begging my mom to let me stay up for another episode of Mork & Mindy. She usually obliged for at least one episode and rolled her eyes more than once as I Nanu Nanu'd along with my favorite alien. One of the first movies I saw in a movie theatre was Aladdin, and I was ecstatic when my mom told me the Genie was the same voice as Mork.

That love always stayed.

From Mrs. Doubtfire (a movie that practically defined childhood for my generation) to Flubber to the serious movies... Jakob the Liar (being one of the most underrated in my opinion), Good Will Hunting and What Dreams May Come... his performances was awe inspiring and captivating. Dark or light, serious or comedic, he had a presence that was undeniable to even someone like me on the other side of the screen. Buzzfeed highlighted some good performances in this article too. He also was a huge supporter of our military and his USO shows were legendary. He has even been referred to as the Bob Hope of our generation for his work with the USO. The military community is even reeling from the loss.



Source

Yesterday I was watching TV when my friend Donna texted me the news. I gasped out loud, probably scaring Ryan a bit, and googled it. It was popping up everywhere. He was gone, suicide.

"You have an internal critic, an internal drive that says, `OK, you can do more.' Maybe that's what keeps you going," Williams said. "Maybe that's a demon. ... Some people say, `It's a muse.' No, it's not a muse! It's a demon! DO IT YOU BASTARD!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! THE LITTLE DEMON!!"

His demons won out. His struggles with addiction and depression were not a secret, they've been a source of contention for him for years, and he spoke about them quite a bit. But I don't think anyone saw this coming. My adoration is well known in my family and friends so I had people texting me and facebooking me to check in and see how I was doing. Seriously.

Source    

Hollywood has lost some great talent in my lifetime, but none hit me as hard as this. I know it is silly to mourn for someone you have never met, but this man has made a huge impact on my life, both personally and as an actor. His talent is awe inspiring and no one will probably ever be able to come close to replicating it. It may be silly for me to dedicate an entire blog entry to this, but it's my blog, I'll do what I want. It feels like an extended uncle four times removed has died... someone who helped shape my childhood and my love of acting... and it sucks.

Source

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,

The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won,

The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,

While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;

But O heart! heart! heart!

O the bleeding drops of red,

Where on the deck my Captain lies,

Fallen cold and dead.

 

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;

Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,

For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,

For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;

Here Captain! dear father!

The arm beneath your head!

It is some dream that on the deck,

You’ve fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,

My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,

The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,

From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;

Exult O shores, and ring O bells!

But I with mournful tread,

Walk the deck my Captain lies,

Fallen cold and dead.

Walt Whitman

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.