First Trimester

The Monday before Thanksgiving was when I decided to finally take a pregnancy test. All month Ryan kept saying he had a good feeling that this was our month and I finally started to agree with him. What tipped me over the edge was that I was lying in bed that morning, watching a youtube video of Pentatonix singing a Star Wars tribute at the American Music Awards when something unusual happened.... when the orchestra joined them I started crying! Even though my period wasn't due for another two days I decided to test and sure enough....

Positive! Once again I went nuts, jumping up and down and yelling and scaring the dog. Ryan was at work so I texted him asking if I could bring him lunch. I was bursting to tell him! He agreed so I grabbed some Panera and drove to meet him at work. It was freezing out so I was sitting in the car waiting for him (like last time, ironically) and he was waving at me to come in to the office. I told him no and to come and sit in the car for a second and my smart alec husband goes, "Why, are you pregnant?"

Yes! I didn't plan on videoing it or anything like last time but it was funny and very typical of us (see our engagement for an example) regardless. He was so excited and there were tears on both ends. We called both our parents that day, but kept it pretty quiet from everyone else for a bit. I went to the doctor the next day to do their test and I overhydrated! Imagine my surprise when the hospital calls and says my test was negative! So I went back the next day and we got our positive. Whew. Over Thanksgiving we told Ryan's grandmother and sister, but kept it quiet from everyone else for the most part. Over the next few weeks we let our very close friends know but after our previous loss we didn't want to get too excited too soon.

I didn't even start progress pictures until week 8 because I didn't want to jinx anything! Week 5-6 was brutal regardless and I ended up in the ER unable to keep even water down, but luckily I started vitamin b6 and have been ok for the most part since. Thank you pregnancy pops and drops too!

We told my (extended) family about my pregnancy a little earlier than we would have planned, but being we were in New Jersey for Christmas and able to tell them in person was too big an opportunity to pass up. To tell my 93 year old Poppy and 90 year old Babci in person they were going to be great grandparents again was wonderful. Poppy had tears in his eyes and it was so special for Ryan and I to do... so we told them early!

I feel like in the early pictures I look so so exhausted! I was sleeping 9 to 11 hours a night and still tired. Combination first trimester and thyroid for sure.

Week 10 was when I had my first official appointment with a midwife. At around week 8 I met with a nurse but it was just the preliminary sort of appointment. This time we got to actually see our Bean (the nickname has stuck for now!) and hear the heartbeat. I cried the entire time and Ryan had the goofiest smile... it was amazing. We had quite the surprise with the thyroid diagnosis at this appointment but we got the ball rolling on that treatment within 24 hours. I am so thankful for my midwife for that.

Bean was moving around like crazy. In the above one you can see Bean is kind of waving at us, but we also saw so much movement and flipping around. Plus we saw the thumping and pumping of the heart.

And here was the transition to maternity clothes. I can still fit in my pre pregnancy clothes but buttons and zippers are not comfy when you're bloated! The below outfit is a pregnancy top and pregnancy leggings and I loved it.

Dup usually loves to be close and rest her head on us, but I couldn't resist this picture. I was working on my lines for a show I am in and she snuggled right in. Sometimes I think she knows I am pregnant, other times she practically knocks me down and I roll my eyes and forget it!

Weekly Pregnancy Survey:

What Fruit are you? I believe this week my Ovia app said I was a beet but the graphics app I use says lemon.

Due date: August 5, 2016 

How far along: 14 weeks 3 days

Next appointment:  March 7th

Gender:  Unknown so far!

Total weight gain/loss: About 7-8 pounds... officially the heaviest I have ever been in my life and we got a ways to go! 

Exercise: Um... I have to walk really far from my car to the new library branch I transferred to? When the weather is nice we take the Dup for walks but it has been cold and rainy here lately.

Stretch marks: I always had them, but no real noticeable new ones yet.

Swelling: My fingers look a little swollen around my rings but nothing major

Maternity clothes: Maternity jeans are my new favorite thing! I have a few shirts and a pair of leggings too

Belly button: Normal  

Sleep: Starting to get really uncomfortable. I wake up at least once a night to pee but my back has been bothering me lately so I do lots of tossing and turning, even with my big body pillow

Food cravings:  Mango has been the big one! I love fruit... watermelon, starfruit, berries. All good! I also love French fries but try to not have them often. Pancakes from Cracker Barrel have won my soul over too.

Symptoms:  It is hard to tell sometimes if it is my thyroid or pregnancy sometimes! I get super hungry every now and then and have some major fatigue still. Skin has been breaking out and my chest has grown like crazy. I occasionally get some cramping but nothing bad or worrisome.

Movement:  I thought I felt a flutter once but it could have been gas :P

Labor signs: None yet thankfully!

What I miss:  Not too much, but I did want eggs benedict the other day and research said that was a no due to the runny eggs. Bummer.

What I'm loving:  That I am starting to have a slightly noticeable bump that isn't just bloating. Soon I will actually look pregnant and not just chubby!

What I'm looking forward to:  The bump short term, and feeling Bean move... and long term meeting Bean!

Best moment this week:  Lounging in sweat pants all day to watch the Super Bowl. I was a comfy and happy pregnant lady!

News:  Anatomy scan scheduled for March 7th. Officially classified as a 'high risk pregnancy' due to my thyroid.

Milestones: 2nd Trimester!

Words of wisdom: None yet really.

So we are a third of the way there! I will try and not bore you all with too much pregnancy stuff, but I am pretty excited and do want to document this for our families. Thank you so much for all the well wishes (and good thoughts and prayers)!

2015 Retrospect

Every year I try and do a retrospect post of all the things that have happened in the past year. Last year was a rough year and I was very optimistic going in to 2015 that this year would be better than the last. Unfortunately 2015 ended up being a rough year for us as well. I didn't blog a lot, but between losing our first pregnancy, marital troubles, legal issues and other things, 2015 was pretty harsh too. I hope I do not sound like a broken record when I say I hope 2016 is a better year and I make you all positively nauseous with how great it becomes, but here is hoping.

Past retrospects:
2014
2013
2012
2011
2010

January

We spent New Years in the mountains with my family since we didn't see them for Thanksgiving or Christmas with them. Unfortunately I had horrendous gall bladder attacks the entire weekend and could barely move.

We also took our first trip to a local favorite, Mike's Farm, as pictured above.

Ryan and I decided to go in for a Tune Up of sorts.

Ryan had his IUT (or Training) Cycle as an instructor with SOI-E.

At the end of the month I finally had surgery to remove my gallbladder, hoping my stomach issues would subside. Not the case.

February

I spent most of February pretty sick recovering from my surgery at the end of January.

But we did manage to have a nice Valentine's Day together before I went back to work.

I spent the rest of the month sick, on and off, trying to gather myself.

March

Ryan was still going through cycles with work and I was still sick.
I did take some time to do a rare craft post on this blog with my wine cork wreath.

April

April things got better.
We spent a nice, quiet Easter together at home.
My brother Stefan came and spent his Spring Break with us.
And we attended our first Dining In together, which was a nice excuse to dress up!

May

In May we were officially gutted as my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage on our fifth wedding anniversary. It was truly devastating. 

June

I went to my first ever Jane Wayne Day or, In Their Boots Day, as it is now called.
I blogged a bit more about our loss.
My baby brother graduated high school.

July

I didn't blog a lot in July, but I did a quick update with the 4th of July and the birth of our niece.
To get away for awhile I joined my parents, brother, aunt, uncle, and cousins at the OBX.

August

Stefan came and spent another week with us in August before he left for college.
Ryan and I took a day to be spontaneous and drove to Myrtle Beach SC and rode in a helicopter. It was so flippin' cool!

September

September nearly shattered me again. I didn't go in to details, but something happened that will change the course of our lives and it nearly broke me.
I turned 28 and time continued on. We spent the weekend with my parents at their new house.
And I did a random sort of post that talked about 9/11, football, Etsy shops and nail polish. Because, why not?
I got cast as Mercutio in Romeo and Juliet at the local Community College Theatre.

October

I blogged my frustrations in the form of a Cha Cha and the author of the quote commented on my entry, which was very touching.
Romeo and Juliet was cancelled three weeks before the show thanks to shoddy administration at the college.
I became a blogger with Influenster
My grandparents visited my parents for a few weeks so we went to see them and I learned some important family traditions.
My major nerd side came out with Back to the Future Day
Plus we had a pretty epic Halloween.

November

Ryan and I went to the Polish Festival in early November, where it was over 80 degrees.
We attended the USMC Birthday Ball.
Plus we spent Thanksgiving in South Carolina with Ryan's family.

December

We met my family in New Bern and went to Tryon Palace to see it for Christmas. It was in the 70s.
Plus we spent Christmas in New Jersey, which made my heart very happy.
I auditioned with another local community theatre (NOT at the college) and got cast as the Judge in John Grisham's A Time to Kill. The show will start rehearsing in January and go on in March.

So there you have it, my 2015 retrospect. I overly optimistically blogged in my 2014 retrospect that 2015 couldn't possibly get any worse... naive I know, but let's hope for sure 2016 is accurate in that. It will be a fantastic year. My stomach will settle, our lives and jobs will be ok, and everything will keep moving forward.

Happy New Year my friends.

Great Scott!

Ok, if you're a long term reader you should know by now I am pretty much a nerd, so this entry shouldn't be too shocking for most of you. For new readers, well, surprise! I'm a nerd!

Today, October 21, 2015, is Back to the Future Day. On this day Marty and Doc Brown arrive from 1985 to the future.... after today Back to the Future will officially be in the past. Scary huh? Back to the Future (1, 2 and 3) have always been some of my most favorite movies. I have owned a BttF shirt for many years. In Universal Studios I bought myself a Hill Valley class ring (no, you cannot make this stuff up). In college I had a full size movie poster from the first movie that hung up in my dorm rooms and apartments until I graduated. I have owned the trilogy on DVD for years after scoring them for super cheap at a Black Friday sale years and years ago. Needless to say, I have waited for this day for ages!

Now it seems like a lot of BttF fans are coming out of the woodwork and I am totally ok with that. Enjoy it!

There are tons of news articles today...

Back to the Future II: What did it get right and wrong?
Test Yourself with this Back to the Future Quiz
Back to the Future: Queensland police deploy 'hoverboard unit'
Great Scott! It's Back to the Future Day
Universal Pictures released a spoof trailer for "Jaws 19"

And more. But seeing this video this almost made me teary...

Sure, we may not have hover boards or flying cars (yet), but we do have 3D movies, thumbprint scanners, flat screen televisions and more. And even though they may not be as prevalent, fax machines do still exist. I have to teach people at the library how to use them on a daily basis! The Cubs even made it to the playoffs!!! I don't think they will win the World Series though, the Mets are on fire, I hate to admit it! You can even buy Pepsi Perfect for $20.15 for a limited time only. Luckily I am a diet coke fan or I'd be tempted. Ok, I am tempted. But they sold out!

One movie theatre in town is showing a double feature tonight at 7pm, but my husband does have work tomorrow even if I am off. We compromised on our own double feature at home tonight after work, care of my DVDs. Fair enough.

The future is not yet written. Make it a good one my friends.

Tune Ups

I have never been one to air dirty laundry on my blog. Most bloggers I know don't. Our blogs are a place where our lives tend to be a little more glossy sheen than chaos. Occassionally people will write about a frustration or two, but I usually will not write about arguments or difficulties. One, it is not something I wish my blog to focus on, and two, it is out of respect for the relationships I do have. That being said, this particular entry is one I have wanted to write for awhile, and everything I mention here has been something my husband and I have both said we are comfortable disclosing.

Marriage Counseling.

We agreed years ago, back when we were newlyweds, if one of us (did not matter which one) ever wanted counseling then we would go... no questions asked, no stalling. We had one time a year or so ago where one of us mentioned it and we looked in to going, but then we managed to regain our footing and never actually went. Or so we thought. The past year or so have been hard for us. Last year Ryan came back from Afghanistan and we jumped right into the holidays. Immediately after that we went out our trip to Europe and as soon as we returned my aunt passed away and I flew to New Jersey. The day after I returned from her funeral I was thrown in rehearsals for a show I had been cast in. So we went from living apart with the deployment, to reintigration that never really had a chance to take and by the time we were both on normal schedules again it was summer practically and Ryan was putting in for his SDA. Then I had another show as Ryan started school for his SDA.... and we both just realized we were fighting a lot and were both pretty unhappy overall. After a particularly large (amd stupid) fight over something insignificant we decided we wanted to go to counseling.

Ryan instantly made a phone call to Military OneSource. Military OneSource offers active duty, reservists on active status, and National Guard members and their families twelve free, non medical, face-to-face counseling sessions with a professional in your area. We had an appointment with a counselor for the next day with that one call. Even making the appointment we felt better and had what felt like our first real discussion in a long time. That was when we realized we both were unhappy... not unhappy that we were married or together, but overall the general feeling of this could be better. This has been better.

We went in to our first session with a little bit of unease, but our counselor got us to talk. Then we had one of our small fights. And he let us. We were on opposite ends of the couch going back and forth jumping from topic to topic when our counselor said something that seems so incredibly obvious, but until we heard it, it never occurred for a moment.

"Is this how you speak to someone you love?"

No. No it isn't.

When we had those stupid arguments, and lord knows we had them a lot, we were both just trying to be heard. It wasn't about the sweet potato or the volume on the tv (seriously), it was wanting our spouse to hear us. We always were the type to bicker, both our parents independently nicknamed us "the Bickersons", but lately it had been so much more than that.

Once we heard that, we began to make a more conscious effort to really hear one another, and talk to each other the way we wanted to be talked to. It sounds so simple when I type it, but it was something that in our frustrations we were missing. We both were overly frustrated to the point where we felt like we weren't being heard and all we did was make our voices louder and louder with effort to be heard. But when someone yells usually the knee jerk response is to stop listening anyway... it is a vicious cycle we were stuck in for sure.

If we are arguing it becomes about winning... and in order for one of us to win one of us has to lose. And marriage shouldn't be about winning and losing. We are on the same team. If one of us loses then we both lose.

Our counselor told us around the five year mark is where a lot of marriages will stumble or falter... it is totally normal. He told us that we both drive cars and every 3,000 or 5,000 miles we need an oil change, right? Well, this is our oil change. We hit so many miles in our marriage and just needed a tune up. We needed to hear some things we had forgotten. After many years together it is easy to fall into a rut or a bad routine or habit, and sometimes you just need someone to nudge you onto the right track again.

After a little more than six or seven sessions there was a remarkable improvement. Heck, after our first session there was improvement! Our counselor recommended a certain book for us, and I am kind of embarassed to say we had a copy already and once we started reading it, it helped. Seriously. We have had more meaningful, real conversations in the past two months than in the whole last year combined probably. We were making the effort to really hear one another again. In our last session, before Ryan started his SDA, we watched a DVD our counselor recommended. During the DVD Ryan had his arm around me and I held his hand. We all noticed how different it was from our first session when we were as far apart as possible on opposite ends of the couch.

Even though it hasn't been long, we are so much happier already. We communicate better... we hear each other more... and we have slowly started eliminating bad habits we formed together. We take responsiblity for our own actions and behaviors, we try and help each other when we have bad days, and we both love each other enough to fight for our marriage. We were never on the verge of divorce or anything, but we knew that our marriage could be better because it had been before. Once the newlywed glow fades and time goes on it is easy to forget you have to check in with one another. This SDA is not going to be easy, and we knew that going in to it, so we both felt very relieved that we were able to reconnect on this level before it started. We plan on going back for another session when his first training cycle is over, but just to check in. We already know we are on a better path at this point and have the tools to keep moving forward.

This isn't a quick fix. Your car still will always need an oil change after so many miles, but at least now we have the tools to do it ourselves next time. And if we keep up the regular maintenance, we will have less problems later.

If you are in a similar situation and a military couple, I highly recommend using these sessions from Military OneSource. Even if you aren't military, some insurances cover counseling for a certain amount of sessions. I am glad we did. And if blogging about it helps anyone else, than the point of writing this has been achieved. I blog to chronicle our lives, sure, but also to help other military spouses who find my blog randomly or who are even regular readers. So there you go... someone else who has been there in some capacity. Every couple has issues and every couple needs a tune up now and then. Go for it. As always, feel free to comment or email me if you have any other questions that I may be able to help with.

Thanks for reading.



PS - This is a non sponsored post and all opinions are my own. Military OneSource is a great resource that we happily used, but they are in no way responsible for the content of this post. Same with the book review on amazon, purely my own opinion.

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I Quit

Source

Smoking that is.

I was scared to mention it to anyone at first. I was worried I wouldn't be able to do it. Ryan actually quit smoking almost a month ago. We fortunately did not quit at the same time (we may have killed each other if we had) and took our own steps and processes with it. Ryan had a fun night and decided to quit on a Sunday where he was slightly hung over and had no desire to smoke at all. By the end of that day he was sort of wanting one and the next few days he really wanted one, but he held out. Me? I wasn't ready yet. I was scared.

But last week something came over me.

I was ready.

And to be honest, unless YOU are ready to quit, I don't think you will be able to.

Source

I am thankful Ryan didn't push me (much) and let me come to it on my own. I was courteous around him as much as I could be. I tried not to smoke in front of him during the hardest parts of quitting, but he surprised me by joining me outside a few times and then it not bothering him at all before long. Ryan told me quitting smoking was the hardest thing he had ever done. Harder than serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. Harder than bootcamp. Which made me more nervous about quitting myself!

I know smoking is unhealthy. And expensive. We both did... but addiction is a powerful thing. And we were very addicted. Ryan has been smoking for ten years. I have been smoking for six years. Man, seeing that in print makes my head spin. Has it really been six years??? Ryan was usually a heavier smoker than me, but in the past year or so I caught up to him. We were both basically pack a day smokers. If we were out (or drinking) it was usually  more. We would go through a carton a week most weeks, if not more. It was time to stop.

So Friday night, I sat in my garage after we came home from bowling with friends. I had two left in my pack. I felt it in my heart then, these would by my last ones, this would be my last pack. Those thoughts ran through my head over and over again as I finished them and went to bed, throwing my empty pack away as I did so.

Saturday was hard.

I hoped to sleep in so I'd have less time to deal with cravings. Even though I went to bed late I was up early. I took it hour by hour. Let me make it until 9am... 10am... 11am... then I started watching movies. Make it to the end of this move. Then the next movie. Ryan eventually got up and found me practically shaking on the couch... I hadn't mentioned to him that I was trying to quit until that moment.

That entire weekend was extremely difficult. I cried more than once, literally sobbed on the couch as Ryan tried to help me through it. Nicotine withdrawl is no joke, I didn't feel like I could make it. I pushed myself just to make it until bed time. I downloaded free stop smoking ads on my phone. I played with silly putty to give my hands something to do. I tried meditative breathing. I drank green tea. I cried more. I paced. I prayed.

And I made it.

The first seventy two hours are the hardest... the most cravings and the strongest. The vivid nightmares and dreams are rough. Then it gets easier. Not easy by any means, but easier.

From my Livestrong App

Saturday should have way, way more cravings, but I didn't download the app until about five pm so the seven cravings I had occured between 5pm and 11pm when I finally crashed into bed. They are becoming less as in I am having less cravings and they are weaker and shorter. Thank God. This app has helped me so much. When I have a craving I hit the button on this app (after seeing my picture of my motivation) and it gives me encouragement statistics and such. I've made it through some major triggers too.... a work day (now week), traffic, driving/being in the car, having a large meal, leaving a movie theatre and others. The two major ones I have yet to encounter are being around someone or a group of people smoking and drinking alcohol. They will happen sooner or later and I feel like I can do it. I wanted to quit and I feel positive about it.

Ryan has been amazing through it all too. I am so proud of him for kicking this off. He read books about it (Never Take Another Puff by Joel Spitzer, a completely free book available online) and chewed gum to curb his cravings. He also switched from coffee to tea, which for those of you who know my husband and his coffee addiction, this is a feat in itself! We both went cold turkey, no patches, nicotine gum or chantix. I personally didn't even chew gum because I didn't want to pick up another habit. Yes I know gum chewing is hardly as bad as smoking but it works in my brain. We've started walking Rylie in the evenings so we don't just sit on the couch and watch TV. Changing our routine helps!

My latest stats from this morning. That's a lot for one week.

I was scared to mention it before now because I didn't want to let anyone down if I failed. Silly right? I know support is important and I am not out of the woods yet, but I am getting there slowly but surely. I made it through the hardest week and I can keep doing it.

If you smoke and want to quit, do it. When you are ready, you will know, and you CAN do it. The LiveStrong app and the QuitIt app (both free) have helped me immensely, especially the LiveStrong app and the community message boards. If you slip and smoke again, it's ok, just try again. Each time will get easier. You CAN do it. If I can, anyone can.

Thanks for reading all, wish me luck!

Source

Loss of a Legend

"You're only given one little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it." - Robin Williams

The only souvenier I asked for on my family trip to Disney that now hangs in our guest room.

Robin Williams has been my favorite actor for my entire life. People have poked fun at me for it (never in a mean way) about how he was always my top of the heap favorite, but I know I am not alone (based on the social media take over alone). The world lost a wonderful, talented man yesterday. I am not going to lie, I cried when I heard he passed away. My entire life I dreamed of meeting him, and my top actor dream of actually acting with him, will now never be realized. This brilliant man had demons darker than any of us knew and is now no longer with us. His wife is a widow and his children are without their father... and it breaks my heart.

 

On acting: "All the new people you meet, it's pretty amazing. The vampire needs new blood. And there is still a lot to learn and there is always great stuff out there. Even mistakes can be wonderful."

I remember being young, really young, and begging my mom to let me stay up for another episode of Mork & Mindy. She usually obliged for at least one episode and rolled her eyes more than once as I Nanu Nanu'd along with my favorite alien. One of the first movies I saw in a movie theatre was Aladdin, and I was ecstatic when my mom told me the Genie was the same voice as Mork.

That love always stayed.

From Mrs. Doubtfire (a movie that practically defined childhood for my generation) to Flubber to the serious movies... Jakob the Liar (being one of the most underrated in my opinion), Good Will Hunting and What Dreams May Come... his performances was awe inspiring and captivating. Dark or light, serious or comedic, he had a presence that was undeniable to even someone like me on the other side of the screen. Buzzfeed highlighted some good performances in this article too. He also was a huge supporter of our military and his USO shows were legendary. He has even been referred to as the Bob Hope of our generation for his work with the USO. The military community is even reeling from the loss.



Source

Yesterday I was watching TV when my friend Donna texted me the news. I gasped out loud, probably scaring Ryan a bit, and googled it. It was popping up everywhere. He was gone, suicide.

"You have an internal critic, an internal drive that says, `OK, you can do more.' Maybe that's what keeps you going," Williams said. "Maybe that's a demon. ... Some people say, `It's a muse.' No, it's not a muse! It's a demon! DO IT YOU BASTARD!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! THE LITTLE DEMON!!"

His demons won out. His struggles with addiction and depression were not a secret, they've been a source of contention for him for years, and he spoke about them quite a bit. But I don't think anyone saw this coming. My adoration is well known in my family and friends so I had people texting me and facebooking me to check in and see how I was doing. Seriously.

Source    

Hollywood has lost some great talent in my lifetime, but none hit me as hard as this. I know it is silly to mourn for someone you have never met, but this man has made a huge impact on my life, both personally and as an actor. His talent is awe inspiring and no one will probably ever be able to come close to replicating it. It may be silly for me to dedicate an entire blog entry to this, but it's my blog, I'll do what I want. It feels like an extended uncle four times removed has died... someone who helped shape my childhood and my love of acting... and it sucks.

Source

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,

The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won,

The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,

While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;

But O heart! heart! heart!

O the bleeding drops of red,

Where on the deck my Captain lies,

Fallen cold and dead.

 

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;

Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,

For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,

For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;

Here Captain! dear father!

The arm beneath your head!

It is some dream that on the deck,

You’ve fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,

My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,

The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,

From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;

Exult O shores, and ring O bells!

But I with mournful tread,

Walk the deck my Captain lies,

Fallen cold and dead.

Walt Whitman

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Angry

I don't know how many of you have seen this particular news piece floating around, but it is one that makes me particularly angry.

The original story (found here) from a few days ago explains the situation. A former Marine decided to protest the Berghdal/Taliban exchange outside of Parris Island.... you know, because of all the recruits coming in and out of the gates there. Seriously, protest all you want, but at least put some thought into your location. Something pertaining to politics perhaps, or an Army base? Regardless, he decided to wear his campaign cover, the hats all drill instructors in the Marine Corps wear, as a sign of solidarity to "all the active duty military that can't protest" about this.

Sgt Major Archie heard about this and on the phone asked the former Drill Instructor not to wear his campaign cover to the protest. The man ignored him and Sgt Major Archie saw him wearing the cover the next day. He pulled over, the two men got into a shouting match, and the Sgt Major knocked the cover off the guy's head when he got too close. He then grabbed the cover and drove on back to base.

Now the former Drill Instructor (who I do not even want to give the pleasure of naming, that's my opinion of him) is pressing third degree assault and battery charges. Sgt Major Archie turned himself in to the police immediately after the event and was bailed out that evening.

Now I just read that Sgt Major Archie is voluntarily stepping down.

And I am so angry.

Do you have the right to protest? Absolutely. Do you have the right to wear pieces of a military uniform, active duty or not, to said protest? NO. You do not. Sgt Major Archie acted like I believe almost any military member would. You cannot wear your dress blues to the grocery store once you get out. Military functions, parades, weddings, funerals, ceremonies... yes. Protests??? HELL NO. You know better former Drill Instructor. You keep yelling in the video that you're no longer a Marine and the Sgt Major has no authority over you and then turn around to the news crew and say you wore the cover in solidarity with those who are active duty?? You cannot even keep your own viewpoint straight!

Not only that, but this is on a semi personal level. Sgt Major Archie was the Sgt Major in my husband's unit up until earlier this year. When my husband was in Afghanistan the Sgt Major got orders back to Parris Island, his dream job, and sadly left. I saw him at many functions prior to the deployment and heard how he spoke to the Marines, and it was inspiring. The man was motivated, cared about his job and his Marines, and was a prime example of what a Sgt Major should be. His voice was stereotypically Drill Instructor, deep and gravelly and just awesome. I nearly giggled the first time I heard him shouting motivationally across a unit softball game. He was an exceptional leader and my husband constantly said how much all the Marines loved working under him.

And now that man is no longer an active duty Marine after doing what (I personally believe) is right. It is a damn shame. I am saddened to see he resigned and I know I am not alone in that.

To that former Drill Instructor who caused most of this mess; you're a disgrace and an idiot. I hope karma is swift with you.

Period.