He's Home!!!

Ryan is officially in Quantico!

First Deployment = OVER!

I cannot believe it.

I got my first phone call since September 28th this morning. He had to borrow his Sgt's phone since he didn't get his yet, but it was so so so good to hear his voice!!!! I got all teary. Now I somehow need to get to Friday so I can SEE HIM!

Is it Friday yet?!?!

I'll write more later, just had to share!

SOON!

He will be home in SO SOON. It is basically 99.99% official. I cannot wait. I am just waiting to hear from him to confirm that he wants me in Quantico on the day and I will be there. It has been three days now since we spoke so I am dying to hear from him for the all clear go ahead. Something tells me this week will be impossibly long but I will get through it. Cross your fingers Disney gets me off work for a few days. Especially with that unfortunate sick day under my belt...

Note to self: Find a doctor and get an appointment for Monday. Gall bladder you will NOT win!

Wish me luck readers. This deployment is winding down!

Just Another Tuesday...

You know, when that Tuesday is probably the last time you're going to see your boyfriend for seven months. I didn't have rehearsal yesterday and Ryan got off work early so I drove down to see him. It took me about an hour and a half thanks to traffic but I got there early enough to beat rush hour at least. I helped him pack up some of his stuff in his room. He has been trying to pack all week but everytime they get something packed their section leader wants to do an inspection so they have to unpack to do it all again! Well, their idea of packing is rolling something into a ball and shoving it into the bag and standing on it or punching it until it is compact.

After packing for a bit we went for dinner in Q-Town at this place called Sam's. It was pretty good, I got some stuffed shells and loved being able to sit and eat with my Marine in his camis. He's too adorable in them.

We went back to the room and hung out a bit more. It was so surreal that this may be the last time we're together besides the send off. It was really hard to wrap my brain around. I just loved being with him, I kept the tears in check the entire time and just enjoyed being with him. A bunch of the guys ended up wanting to watch the Big Lebowski so we started that but it started getting late. Halfway through the movie I knew I needed to go if I was going to make the trip home.

I offered to stay at the Crossroads, the hotel on base, so we could have one more night together. Just to fall asleep with him at my side. But he said no. It was a waste of money and things would be harder for him if we did that. So I respected that and left. He walked me to my car and we said our goodbyes. I was doing pretty well until he said, "I'll see you at send off." I got in the car and waved goodbye and as soon as he was out of sight I started crying. I called my mom and talked to her the entire way back to DC. I don't know what I'd do without her.

Thanks to road work I got home at around 12:30am. I texted Ryan to tell him I made it home and say good night and got a text back. Then he texted me again saying he was a dumbass. I replied, Why??? He basically went on to tell me that he thought it would be easier if he didn't spend the night with me and now all he wanted was me lying next to him one more time before he goes. I replied to him that he would not have said that originally if he didn't know deep down it was true and that it was ok. I didn't feel it really but I was sort of telling him what I knew he needed to hear, because lord knows I just wanted to be with him! And he replied that he just didn't know, he was so confused. He knows he wants to be with me forever but he can't so he is pushing me away which is the opposite of what he wants. I told him again it was ok. He could push me all he wanted I am not going anywhere. And we can be together. We will make it through this deployment and have time for one another fully once more. I even offered to drive down tomorrow night (aka tonight) to spend it with him when I got off rehearsal if he wanted me to.

And that was kind of where we left it. Tack on an I love you and that was it.

Today is our one year and two month anniversary.

Last Weekend

Well, this weekend was officially my last weekend with Ryan. Friday he came up to DC when I got out of rehearsal, and since he was off work, and it was so good to see him. He met me at Target because I was running an errand for the opera I am stage managing, and then we ran to Old Navy so I could get a shirt for the fourth of July. After that we went and saw Ice Age 3, which was a cute movie. Funny. Sequel-y. I love watching movies with him. The theatre behind my apartment has arm rests that can lift up so you can snuggle like on a loveseat and Ryan always sits with his arms around me, it is really the best way to watch a movie.

Once the movie was over we went back up to my place and made dinner together. I made macaroni and cheese, baked beans, as well as cucumbers in vinegar and pepper. Ryan defrosted and fried chicken and then smothered it in Maurice's yellow bbq sauce that was terrific. It was a damn good dinner. We were watching X-Men on tv while we cooked and ate, then watched Jeff Dunham which was absolutely hilarious.

I hope that works. That was the sketch that Ryan and I died laughing to. Achmed the Dead Terrorist. If it doesn't work, youtube it! Friday night finished off enjoyably... and it was the first time all week I fell asleep without using Tylenol Sleep.

Saturday we woke up and my Dad stopped by on his way back from North Carolina where he was house hunting. We went to the Red Rock Canyon Grill in Silver Spring for lunch and it was nice that we got to spend some time with him. Then Ryan and I went back to my place and watched Grease 2. Not really a fan.... but then we left and drove down to Quantico.

We spent the fourth behind the barracks hanging out with a bunch of guys on the Task Force. We had hot dogs and hamburgers, there was beer and beer pong, sparklers, and a bonfire. It was fun! Then the boys were all drunk and climbing trees to pull down branches to put on the fire. Drunk Marines in trees are not a good idea. But I met another girl named Megan who is on my yahoo group and her husband is deploying with Ryan. We talked for a bit and it is nice to know someone is going through the same things I am. Hopefully we'll keep in touch. I talked to a lot of the guys and had a nice evening. Then someone set off a firework and everyone ran and hid for a bit. No fireworks on base boys! Bad! :P One other guy in Ryan's unit actually has his wife working at Disney! She plays Mickey in Animal Kingdom and stuff. Very cool.

I got tired and went to bed around 1:30am. In the hour or hour and a half Ryan was out there without me he managed to burn his thumb, sprain his finger, and bruise his ankle playing football. Oy. But he eventually came up to bed and then proceeded to hog the blankets all night in the blazing Air Conditioner. He is never cold and then he steals the sheets when I need them most. Men.

Slept in sort of the next day. I slept til 11:30am and Ryan slept til 1pm. Showered and got ready. Then we went and met our friends Dell and Janos for lunch at Chilis. After they dropped us off at the barracks again we went upstairs to nap around 4pm. Four and a half hours later I wake up wondering where the hell I am! We passed out!! Then we scrambled to get air in Ryan's tire, gas, a quick McDonalds dinner, and then start driving me back to DC. We talked in the car on and off.... sort of promised to spend next Saint Patrick's Day together no matter what if possible.

Then when we got to my building it was so hard to say goodbye. Lots of hugging, tearing on my part, more hugging and kissing. Then I gave him my claddaugh ring. I was planning to save it for the busses but I doubted I'd be able to keep it together to tell him why I was doing it, so I did it last night. I have been wearing Ryan's ring since August so I figured he could take mine with him. The claddaugh symbolizes love, friendship, and loyalty, all of which I think symbolize our relationship. I also wanted him to know he always has my heart and now he has a small physical piece of it with him. Last night when we spoke on the phone he told me he put it on his dog tags which made me tear again.

I cried when he really left and we made tentative plans to see one another Tuesday, pending he get off work early and I do not have rehearsal. I hope we can. Really badly.

Still no word on when they're officially leaving, what time or where from, but I am on pins and needles. I found myself randomly sobbing as I fell asleep last night and I couldn't control it. I was also pondering my own life and mortality which freaked me out and made me stay up until almost 3am. I woke up at 11am and now have rehearsal at 5:30.

I miss him so much already.