*moment*
Ok I promise to stop.
Now, I have no idea how to properly put my thoughts into this entry without sounding whiney or out there in left field, but I will try.
Now as many of you know (at least those of you who have read my blog for a few months know) Ryan is due for his first re-enlistment in May. I've blogged about this and the choices he has struggled with. For awhile he was re-enlisting and staying infantry. Then he was getting out and getting a security job. Then the FBI. Then he was joining the Air Force. Then he was joining the Reserves. Then he was going for CID... CID was full. Then it was MCCS. Then it was Intelligence.
Pause.
That's where this saga left off. Ryan was applying for his new MOS of Intelligence and really hoping to make it. Worst case scenario he'd re-enlist infantry and try in two years.
Now we're sitting down and eating dinner last night. Ryan is on the range all week, he looks like a roly poly man from all the layers he has on and comes home positively chilled to the bone and exhausted every night. So the past few nights it was shower, soup and bed. But I was feeling extra domestic so I made steak and potatoes and string beans so he could have some real, hot food! We're sitting and eating when he suddenly looks up at me and goes:
"So what if I re-enlist to become a recruiter?"
....
Where did this come from?
"Well I like to talk to people. I really enjoyed RA when I did it. It is a garunteed non-deployable for three years, there is no bonus but I'd pick up Sgt. I thought you'd like it."
"Yes, the non-deploying part is great. I love that. But what about Intell?"
"I can do that in three years or so."
"Ryan, you're going to get bored fast with that. You said the reason you did not want to do MCCS was because you didn't want to see the other guys deploying and going out when you can't!"
"Well that is on an actual base THERE, that's different."
Ok I won't keep up with the detailed conversation, but points covered were the fact we could end up in Podunk Idaho (no offense to any Idaho-ans) for three years. I'd have no job, no nearby base, and a husband working all the time. I know recruiters have long hours and have to work a lot with recruits/potentials.... I know Ryan's took him to strip clubs and bars (to which he replied it was after he graduated boot camp only and that they were all single).
I just don't know.
It seems like it came out of nowhere. I love the non-deploying aspect, I really really do.... but it feels like the wrong time for this kind of job. If we were ready to settle, start a family, I feel like it would be better. I know if we do this now and settle somewhere for three years when the time comes to move, PCS, or deploy it will be an even larger slap in the face! Are three years of garunteed non-deploying worth the rude shock later? (Half of me screams YES the other half is like HELL NO!)
Argh I am just so confused. What if this is just another phase like the FBI/Air Force/MCCS/CID ones? What if I get all gung ho and supportive just to have him tell me he changed his mind (again) and he wants to be a fire eater with the circus. Ok I am exaggerating, I will support him no matter what (he's my hubby, I love him, it's a duh thing) but this changing your mind thing is getting very difficult to deal with.
What do you all think about such a thing?
He totally sounds like Jacob, that he just can't make up his mind, I would be freaking out girl. Talk to Taryn @ mainly Taryn and see what she says about it, you can find her in my blogs.
ReplyDeleteUghhh, At least he is looking at everything.. Ha. It will be okay he will probably want change his mind again, ha.
I met Frank when he was on recruiting duty. I would really suggest not doing it. It's absolutely awful and there is a reason that something like 75% of recuiters don't make it through it without divorcing. Send me an email and I can tell you all about it!
ReplyDeletePush intel... most radio battalion guys do an enlistment at a deploy-able unit, then at a "non-deploy-able" unit (aka- most never deploy, etc. if by chance he does they are usually 4mo max). My cousin was an Analyst in a Radio Bn and that's how it played out.
ReplyDeleteIts tough when they keep changing their mind. My husband is at a crossroads in his career as well and needs to make a decision. But I feel in the end as a wife you just have to support him and let him do what he truly wants to do. After all he is the one that has to actually do that job day in and day out for 3 years. He should at least somewhat enjoy and be happy with what he is doing and not be doing it because someone else thinks it is what he should be doing. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who's husband is a recruiter now and the guy HATES it. He said it is the worst job ever. My friend isn't too fond of it either, she says he's gone from before the sun comes up until after it's set for the night. Some people love recruiting, but if your husband is the kind that really loves being infantry, he may want to pull his hair out with recruiting.
ReplyDeleteIt's just a personal preference.
My husband did recruiting duty when he was single. I know he worked ALL THE TIME. Seriously. He has been working 12-14 hours a day now and he says he feels like he is back on recruiting duty. I don't think it's a job for everyone either. My hubby is good at talking, shooting the shit, whatever. He also really loves and believes in the USMC and what he does. It's easy to sell what you believe in. But, it's up to you guys. If he does go the recruiter route, just know that you won't be there forever. It's only a couple years and you'll be on to the next adventure.
ReplyDeleteGirl, I know the feeling! My husband changed his mind about what he wanted to do before re-enlisting about... ten times! Each time, I said..do what you want baby, I'm here no matter what. He brought up to be a recruiter too but didn't think it was the right time! I know a girl who's husband was a recruiter and like all jobs in the military - they have there ups and downs! Like your husband.. my husband "heard" from so and so that is was a great place to be. I finally told him - PLEASE just listen to your heart and go for what YOU really want to do. I got so sick of hearing him say "well so-in-so said this, so I think it will be better then the job I have now"... ugh! Finally he made a decision and luckily got approved!
ReplyDeleteI hope that he can make a decision.. let's see.. May is three months away.. he will probably change his mind a couple more times! lol Good luck girl :)
Jay is Infantry all the way! He actually just re-enlisted in November for six more years.. I just told Jay that he should do what makes him happy and I will support him no matter what. I don't want him to be miserable, working a job that he hates.. I want him to love what he's doing!
ReplyDeleteGoodness! Decisions, decisions! My husband just told me that he wants to do recruiting next. I know he will do great because he has been a Career Retention Specialist for many years now, but it's all the what ifs.. What if we get somewhere that is awful? (I think that is my biggest worry, lol) But, I agree with the other girls-- he could hate it. He should do something that will enjoy, and leave you happy as well. :)
ReplyDeletegirl, I think our husbands would be best buds. so i totally know how you feel. it's rough, and I try to be really supportive, but when things keep changing sometimes i don't know what to do other than keep quiet and wait for the next change. i really don't care what he does as long as he DOES something and stops talking about what he should/could do. all these years, i was tracking malu going back on active duty to go SF and all of a sudden he tells me last week that he wants to do medical school and become a surgeon. what???? but best of luck to you guys and hope you reach an agreement on something soon!
ReplyDeleteHi! I just came across your blog and this particular post caught my eye because it reminds me of my hubby and I. My husband is an 0331 machine gunner and back in 2007 while deployed, we decided to re-enlist in recruiting duty. We were sent to Madison WI in 2008 and are now coming to the end of this duty. My husband is very passionate about the marine corps and even more proud to be a grunt. He absolutely dislikes being a recruiter because he feels, in his own words, that "it's not the Marine Corps". He loves being in the fleet and deploying. Although he is not too fond of this duty, we were able to start our marriage being able to be together every night during the lat 3years. He is also very successful in this duty and was meritorously promoted to SSGT which is very hard to pick up for his particular MOS. There are alot of downfalls in recruiting, ling working hours for one, but the fact that we were able to live "civillian" lives for the first few years of marriage was great. We also welcomed a daughter 4months ago and I'm glad that he was with me during the entire pregnancy, birth and hopefully he will still be stateside by the time she turns 1 so he is able to experience our daughter's "first" together. Recruiting duty is not the best duty but It's got alot
ReplyDeleteOf benefits.
My 18 yr old son enlisted in the Marines as part of their Split Program and had planned to ship out for boot camp on 06.06.11 (since November 2010). His recruiter told him today this would not happen and instead gave him two other options...first, he could ship out on the 16th of May and still be in the Split Program, but miss "walking" and giving a senior speech he'd prepared for his graduation. Or second, he could ship on the 28th of June and forgo the Split Program and be active duty. I personal think the recruited failed to get his paperwork turned in but has instead blamed it on a "gletch" in the system. This was not what was agreed upon when he signed up. What if anything can he do? As a mom, I need help, please.
ReplyDeleteMom in KS
Hello Ladies,
ReplyDeleteAs i read each and everyone of your blogs, i have come to realize that we all have something great in common..... Our Undecided Marines. I am new to this whole Military lifestyle, My amazing boyfriend is deployed to afganistan on a Seven month tour. We have been together for almost a year now and there have been talks about Marriage. The thing is he is looking to re enlist, but isnt sure as to what exactly he want to do. After a near death exprience a couple of weeks ago, he has decided to no reenlist with infantry YAY!! He has definately given me a rundowm of what his options are when it comes to re enlisting and we really wants to weight out his option of remainging in the USMC or doing something else in the military branches. He knows that i am his No.1 Supporter and i will always have his back. On the otherhand i will like to know now what lies ahead for us, so that i can look forward to the future.