• Allie and Ryan

    Allie & Ryan

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    Allie & Ryan

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    Allie & Ryan

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    Allie & Ryan

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    Allie & Ryan

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Doctors and Opinions

So I have had back issues since highschool. They come and go, it is usually horribly tight and I pull it out very easily. I did so last month quite horribly. Ryan almost took me to the ER since I was in so much pain, but the idea of getting in the car made me feel physically ill. Instead we dug out the percocet and I knocked out for the night. For days after I couldn't even bend, which was hell working all day with six year olds!!! But from then on I tried to get a doctor appointment. I had enough. Eight years of this on and off is ridiculous!

I relocated to Bolling Air Force base for my Dr and I could not get an appointment. I was off for two weeks before starting my new job and there was zero availability. If I heard, "If you are in severe pain you can go to the ER or Urgent Care." one more time I was going to lose it. I was not in pain at the time, I was trying to prevent future issues and figure stuff out!! I finalyl got frustrated this week and called TriCare and changed my provider to Ft Belvoir. I changed my information, called the appointment line, and had an appointment scheduled THAT NIGHT at 6:40pm!! Amazing. This was Monday by the way.

After work I drive over to Belvoir, about twenty or thirty minutes away, and my GPS takes me to the wrong gate. You military gals know that is a pretty big no-no. Oops. Even playing the "Sorry I've never been here before" card I still felt like an ass. So I get to the right gate and no surprise I get pulled over for random inspection. Apparently I was the first gold car they saw that day and he thought, Why the heck not? His words exactly. Did I mention I have five minutes to find the hospital at this point, and park and get to my appointment? I pop the trunk (and prop it open with my stick as the spring doesn't hold it open anymore) the hood (with difficulty, I couldn't get it for some reason) and all the doors as the dog sniffs around. They give me directions to the hospital and I have one minute to get there.


I arrive at the hospital almost ten minutes late. I RUN up the stairs and somehow find the clinic and miraculously enough they agree to see me! My blood pressure and heart rate were through the roof from my run so the nurse had to take it three times! Oops again.

I see the doctor, he is not my new primary but he was available and I was fine with that. I told him about my back pains, my problems, and my theories. It was the most productive appointment I ever had. Within five minutes after my appointment walked down the hall to the pharmacy and got my two perscriptions filled (free! I love that!) for Percocet and Flexoril, a muscle relaxer, for when I need them. Then I walked a little further down the hall and right in for an xray on my back. No wait whatsoever!! I am pretty impressed Belvoir! I also got two recommended consultations, one with a physical therapist and one with a plastic surgeon.

A plastic surgeon you ask?

Well, myself and quite a few people I am close with have a theory behind my bad back. It started in highschool when I went from an A cup to a C cup my freshman year. I have never in my life been a B cup! I skipped right over it. Ever since I routinely pull my back out. It is excrutiating! I slouch all the time, I am extremely self conscious of my chest size (which has since of course grown). Clothes shopping is awful. If it fits my chest it doesn't fit my waist and vice versa. Don't even get me started on bathing suits! The one bikini I have owned in the past eight years I got at a specialty store and came with underwire and thick straps. If I wore, say a bikini from Target, I would look like a street walker. If I put two together I would maybe cover one! Once I heard Barbie, if she were a real person, would not physically be able to stand up straight because of her proportions. I can relate.

I have considered a breast reduction since about my senior year of highschool, when my chest started getting really big. No I know my size compared to some is not that bad. I borderline a 36D and DD. It is hard. I feel very out of proportion. In jeans I maybe wear a size 4. My waist, like when I am finding dresses, can fit into a 6/8... but my chest I have to get a 10 or 12 to fit! I was terrified when shopping for my wedding gown I was going to look huge and top heavy no matter what. I didn't want a strapless dress at all. But luckily I found a beautiful dress that somehow worked with my shape.

The doctor did warn since I am not, "that big", I may have a hard time getting such a thing approved. Also because I am young, and never had children it is another factor that makes them wary. That is one that makes me push, I know when you get pregnant your chest grows. I am terrified of that. I'd get bigger than this??? Also already having back problems I would not be a happy camper. My mother-in-law mentioned when she was pregnant with my sister-in-law Hannah that Hannah sat basically on her spine the whole time. She felt like she had "back labor" towards the end. I wouldn't be able to move if I had that!

I know elective surgery is risky. I have never had anything like that done, I mean I still have my wisdom teeth! But I think the risk may be worth it. To not be in pain. To wear clothes that fit. To not be self conscious all the time. To meet someone and have them look me in the eye instead of the boobs. To not have indents in my shoulder large enough to fit my finger in from my bra bearing so much weight.

So I am reaching out to you readers. What are your thoughts on such a thing? Is an elective surgery a good idea? Should it only be a last LAST resort? Should I go for it and see if they would approve it? Ryan supports it if it means being out of pain and comfortable (Of course I want a B and he wants a C but that is a whoooole nother story!)

What do you think?


  1. It's your body hun, do what you feel is right. You know how I feel :) I think it'll make your back issues better for sure. Even though the doctor says you're not that big, you are for having such a petite figure! I'm not sure if he even took that into consideration?! Good luck dear! *crosses fingers*

    Have a good day at work!! XOXOX

  2. dont listen to what others say or whats "not actually that big". if it makes you uncomfortable you need to do whats right for you! good luck with everything girl :)

  3. I have a problem similar to you... except my waste isn't a 4, but my chest has been overbearing since my sophomore year when I cried in the dressing room because I had to buy a D cup. Now I'm an E, and I have to be really careful how I move as to not pull my back. My regular doctor suggested a breast reduction when I was 18, I just didn't want to be "that girl" and I had a lot of things going on preventing me from having a surgery that would put me out of commission for a while. Now I don't have health insurance and I wish I had done it then. I've been to physical therapy to make my back muscles stronger and less likely to pull, but it's never fully done the trick and I still have a lot of pain. I would get the surgery if I were you. I've never heard of anyone who wasn't happier after.

  4. If it will really make that much of an improvement, then I say do it. Just make sure you do your research on what doctor you use. Make sure you get second opinions and what not. I know you know all this. But in all seriousness, I say go for it. If it will make you physically and emotionally feel better, than that is worth it.

    actually, give me a call tonight, tomorrow, or sometime this week because I want to tell you something. haha.. and not via blog comment. :-)

  5. You need to do what you feel that you need in order to be happy, feel good, and be healthy. No matter what anyone else says or thinks! Weigh all your options and do your research. Then make the best decision for you and your life!

  6. OMG! I know exactly what you are going through. I don't ever remember being a B cup either. I'm 5'4, jean size the same as you, and my breasts when I got measured 2 years ago was 32DDD. I am afraid to get measured again, because I'm sure they are bigger than that. My husband and I have talked about breast reduction. I'm going to try diet and exercise first. If it doesn't work, then I will consider getting the surgery.

    Oh, do your bra straps did into your shoulders where you have what feels like a dip in your bones? I do!

  7. Oh I have the dips!!

    I am willing to try physical therapy first, but who knows?

  8. Omg you have no idea how much we have in common. I'm not married or anything but my Marine is was stationed at Camp Lejuene too! & I too have back problems :p DDDs at 15 isn't s blessing.


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